Sheekha Singh

Writer, Technologist & Podcast Host

Enough of the Gyaan!

No, really, what is it with people giving gyaan these days?What is the obsession with people and their insane tendency to talk and preach about anything and everything? I recently turned 27 and got married too (I know right..sounds super tiring). Even though I felt these 2 events had no correlation whatsoever, but these so-called gyaan giving people didn’t. The moment you describe any experience, or any milestone you’ve hit, people all over are ready to pour the gyaan all down your brain which ultimately goes down the drain. If you are anything like me, then you listen to this gyan giving tourture session and do what you have to do anyways, but there are some people who take it very seriously. My question to these people is how do you make decisions on your own if all you are doing is taking gyaan from people who have nothing better to do with their time than to give gyaan.?

There is, however, a subtle difference between good gyaan and faaltu gyaan. For instance, good gyaan is someone telling you do’s and don’ts at a new place abroad that you are planning to visit this summer or a friend giving you gyaan about how that bf of yours is trashy and you need to get rid of him asap, but anything that isn’t useful is bekaar gyaan. 

Don’t get me wrong, I do love asking and giving suggestions in my area of expertise, but the minute anything goes the philosophical way, my brain starts to flash the ‘bekaar gyaan’ distress signal. 

People give useless suggestions when you get married, or are planning to get married, and ALSO, after getting married. I still haven’t understood why is the entire world so obsessed with marriage. Anyways, I’ll save that for another article. 🙂 Friends, family, colleagues, acquaintances, even freaking uber drivers give you gyaan on shaadi. I feel like the world needs to read a letter that starts like this:

Dear World,

Shaadi is overrated and what we do before we get married, during, or after we get married is none of your business. So please, save that shitty gyaan for yourself or your kids.! 

Yours truly,
The millennials. 

I cannot even begin to explain the kind of “here are my 2 cents” talks that come from all walks of life. Here’s how it goes.

Are you married?


How old are you?


Oh really? I had 2 kids when I was your age. You should plan soon.

You should plan for a baby, then a second baby (because humans that do not have siblings are either druggists or have a fucked-up relationship with their parents and cannot live/breathe without a sibling or they end up being aliens)
BTW just google ‘famous only children’ after reading this post and you’ll realise that people who do not have siblings have proven to be more creative and famous since a very long time.

So, where were we? Oh yeah,

You should plan for a second baby, then plan their ridiculously priced theme-based birthdays, their education, their college and their shaadi and their grandkids..and then your retirement and ultimately design the plan for your death.

Thank you, uncles, aunties and Uber drivers, but if I need a plan to design a very sadistic, pathetic life like yours, I will definitely give this plan a thought and come thank you for your gyaan (if we stay in contact that is). 

After careful research, I have figured out that the minute you say the term ‘I’m planning’  or ‘I’m thinking about’ you will be slapped with thousands of recommendations from all corners and dimensions, irrespective of the topic. I have also realised that people give gyaan no matter what.

Like humanity has forgotten the difference between having an opinion, giving an opinion and gyaan. There is a very subtle difference but that has vanished into space. Having an opinion is one thing, but preaching your opinions, forcing them on others and belittling other’s opinions is not healthy. Always remember, that if something worked perfectly fine for you doesn’t imply that it’ll work the same way for everyone in your race. 

The world has changed and so should you. Your idea of a perfect life may not be perfect for the person sitting next to you. Everyone is allowed to live their life their way and be accountable for it. If your ideal perfect life is to have 1 million dollars in your account with a huge mansion, 2 kids, a dog and a trophy wife, then good for you, but it would be incorrect to assume that everyone else you know wants the same life. You never know, this might not even be the ideal life for your own kids, leave alone your friends. 

So, look here, look right at the screen here, focus you, you, right there..and listen carefully..The next time you find yourself giving gyaan.. STOP! Nobody needs it. If someone really needed your knowledge, they would’ve asked for it and you’ll know when to give a suggestion that is USEFUL. 
Also, if you find yourself listening to gyaan, you know what to do. Just look them straight in the eye, make a face and walk away. 

Ok, now I think I should stop before anyone says ‘Enough of your gyaan Sheekha’. 

InExAcT as always.

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